Tuesday, June 27, 2006

The Gospel according to the Bear


I have a couple to share this time. The Bear has been on a roll.

We have been attempting to teach The Bear the Primary songs from church. One of these is called "Follow the Prophet". I guess I really have two with this one, then another one.

The other day The Bear was playing a computer game ridding the galaxy of fouldom when he start singing Follow the Prophet. "Follow the Prophet" BOOM BANG POW "Follow the Prophet"...

Yesterday The Bear and I were working on his rear end for cleaning purposes, when he belts out "Follow the poopy, follow the poopy!"

I tried very hard not to laugh at that last one, but I could not help myself. I laughed long and hard.

Just a few minutes ago, The Bear and I were playing the same boom bang pow game, and while I was taking a turn, he was being overly wiggly. I asked him to stop a number of times, and ended up having to move him to the side for a minute.

When I picked him up again, I gave him a big hug.

Bear: "How come you gave me a hug when you told me to stop wiggling?"

Dad: "Because Jesus says that after you act mean to someone, you have to give them loves!"

Bear: "DUH!"

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Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Yo Hablo Mucho De Nada



A few evenings ago, we finally became acquainted with our Hispanic next door neighbors that have been there for about four years. DramaMama as usual made first contact.

She found out from the wife that she does not read English very well, and was looking for a way to learn. DramaMama immediately set to finding it for her.

She called a woman from church and learned that there was a Spanish-speaking branch of the church that meets in the building at the end of our street. It turned out that this branch was having a party that evening celebrating Father's Day. DramaMama placed a couple more calls and got us all signed up for the luau party.

Did I mention that it was a Spanish speaking branch? :P I had a year of Spanish in high school about 20 years before many of you were born. I thought that this would be a great opportunity to flex my bilingual muscles and help my dear wife to understand what was being said. HA! It was similar to an episode of Charlie Brown when the teacher is talking. "Wah wah... wah wah wah wah amigo wah wah ! Wah wah wah wah Jesus wah wah wah ..."

Luckily, our Spanish speaking neighbors were more than happy to translate for us. We had a very nice time, and made some new friends. We introduced them to the right people that will get them hooked up with an English program.

I told them that I could ask for a drink and the bathroom if anyone needed me to.

About the best I got out in Spanish was, "Esta mui gordo" which sort of means "I am fat". They thought I meant "I am full" but no... just fat. The Fat Gringo they call me.

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Monday, June 19, 2006

The Dancing Pop Tart


Friday evening, DramaMama, The Bear, and I went to Broadway Palm Dinner Theater to see Beauty and the Beast. We enjoyed ourselves.

During the "Be our guest" routine, this "thing" for lack of a better term came whipping through, doing somersaults and was actually quite athletic.

I had no idea what it was supposed to be. I leaned over to DramaMama, "What's with the pop tart?"

"That's the RUG you moron!"

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Monday, June 12, 2006

May the farts be with you


Everyone has had that inopportune time when your body language speaks volumes and your mouth doesn't.

I had one of those moments today that in some ways was hysterically funny, and others was rather mortifying.

I was walking down the hall at a brisk clip this afternoon, when my boss stepped out from one of the offices and I nearly steam-rolled him.

"Daaavvve... how are things going?"

Deciding not to regale him with tales of injury and woe, I said, "Great!" Then it happened.

With no warning whatsoever, a succinct but distinct BLAT sounded.

"OH MAN! Excuse me!"

Without missing a beat, he said, "Just passing through!"

After making myself disappear, I told the guy I share the office with, and we had a good laugh.

Later as I was fondly reminiscing about it, I thought that just how many times in your life do you get to say exactly what you want to your boss, and get away with it. Honestly, I wasn't that great and the body language told the truth. I gave my boss the south port raspberry! WOO HOO!

He'll think twice about asking how I am doing from now on!

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Saturday, June 10, 2006

Holy Crap!


We have a lot of crap! We have been sifting through closets, drawers, deep dark recesses, and the garage looking for stuff we no longer need, and probably never needed. This time we decided that sentimentality would not be the rule. We bit the bullet and ridded ourselves of items that we never thought we could part with. The Bear wasn't very happy with the amount of stuff that we were "giving to other kids".

As I mentioned, we borrowed my sister's truck for what we thought would be two trips to Deseret Industries. Then our stuff started having babies, and it became evident that this project would not be completed today.

After the second trip, we had lunch, then prepping for the third trip I took out my back again. I really hate that. Anyway, DramaMama and DrummerBoy loaded the truck and DrummerBoy drove with me as a passenger.

Although we carted three truckloads away, it seems that we only made a dent. We still cant get the car in garage. Not by a long shot. I think we could fit a Hot Wheels car, but nothing much bigger. I keep saying we need to host a bonfire in the street.

I was very proud of everyone though through this purging. It really felt good to do this

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Friday, June 09, 2006

Climbing Mount Krapatoa



What does this have to do with anything? Not a whole lot, I am just so thouroughly overjoyed that it is finally the weekend, I decided to be silly for a bit to see if I am still alive.

This past week was one that I would not care to repeat anytime soon. It was one of those "I-hit-the-bottom-of-the-barrel" weeks, only to find that there was a hole in the bottom and I kept on going.

Yesterday I had pretty much had it. I came home from work and went straight to bed.

I slept acceptably well last night, and today was much brighter. I was able to flush one of the problematic projects, and actually made some good progress on several others.

This weekend we are de-junking our house. Not in any small way either. DramaMama Has already loaded 4 large garbage bags with clothes to donate to Deseret Industries (similar to Goodwill). I took stabs at the garage and my office, and earmarked many an item for donation. We have so much stuff everywhere that it is nigh unto ridiculous. We have a 2 dumptruck garage that we hope to be able to get a car into one of these days.

We sorted through the Bears toy boxes (3 of them) and boxed up quite a lot. We are borrowing my sister's truck for Saturday to load up with boxes, furniture, clothes, toys, books, computer stuff, and the occasional cockroach.

We thought for a moment about hosting a garage sale, but no more than a moment... it's frickin' 110 outside! The few bucks we would get out of it aren't worth barbecuing my brain cells for.

I feel a lot better today, especially because it is the weekend. I even worked on my book at lunch today!

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Monday, June 05, 2006

You Talkin' to Me???



I can go two ways with this post. Tell you all how I feel, or share another Bear moment.

I guess I'll do both... First the unpleasantness:

I feel a lot like that guy looks... A whole lot of "go away" written all over my face.

I am weathering a severe bout of job burnout. I am so buried that I sometimes want to go nuclear on some people's hind parts. I lately have had little or no desire to even go to work. There are so many things I need to get done with my own little company, and unfortunately, they are very similar to the things I do at work all day. This of course compounds the burnout.

I have had a couple of those projects that just dont want to allow themselves to be completed. One problem after another, and a couple hour job has turned in to a couple week job. There is a high level of frustration in all of this. I am expending all of my energy for some other guy's business, having little or none left for my own.

Now, enough of that...

The Bear and I were playing what he calls "The Different Mister Noodle Game", when he really means "Ludo" which has no real connection to the game other than I gave the characters in the game names from the Harry Potter books. So anyway, he was playing along, and in a singsong sort of voice said, "Bad guys... where are you?"

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